Saw this picture on Twitter and just had to post it. I’ve previously mentioned that I’m fluent in three “languages“, but apparently I forgot one!
The Huffington Post recently launched an article feed called #nofilter featuring a series of rapid fire questions asked to celebrities in order to make them seem – well, more like real people. In recognition of the fast approaching Thanksgiving holiday, HuffPo interviewed Real Housewives of New York alum and creator of the Skinnygirl franchise Bethenny Frankel on some tips for how to avoid overindulging during the holidays. For those of you who don’t know Bethenny, she’s very direct and matter of fact. You can see the entire interview here (it’s not that long), but I think the answers to two of the questions were absolutely hilarious and therefore needed to be shared.
If you were on death row, what would your last meal be?
Probably eggplant parmesan and pizza.
How did you get on death row?
I killed another housewife.
Spoiler alert – if you are a fan and have not yet watched this past Sunday’s episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, you may want to stop reading. But you still should anyway…
For all the fans of the RHOA out there – I’m not a fan of Kenya Moore. I quite frankly find her annoying, obnoxious, and self-centered. And while I’m not exactly on Team Cynthia – I’m kinda waiting for her to cut a b*tch and put Ms Moore in her place. I half expected Cynthia to turn to Kenya during both the Jet Girl casting and the ladies power lunch, pull a Bon Qui Qui on her and say “don’t interrupt, rude!” And I cannot wait for Ms NeNe Leakes to put girlfriend in her place where she belong – on the curb.
I have to say, I never thought I would miss having Sheree on the show so much. And then this happened on the Twatter, and I wished Sheree would check Kenya…
…I will never know the answer. Because quite frankly, the situations my friends and I find ourselves in or just the ridiculous things that we say should be enough to guarantee a prime-time slot on a major network. Memo to ABC – get on this now! Between my crazy medical school friends and my current roommates – that would be a weekly 30 minutes of pure comedy. It would be like Happy Endings – but real life and unscripted.
If any of the overheard posts on the blog havent convinced you, then certainly the ones from the past two days should give you a flavor. Yes, I realize that things arent as funny if you dont hear them live. But the posts from the past two days are the direct result of hanging out with my good friend Scott.
Scott and I both started medical school in Chicago at the same time (he was at UIC while I was at Northwestern). When we met during our second year, it was like two gigantic worlds collided. Scott and I are almost the same person – even though we are kinda different. I am the product of a strongly Roman Catholic Italian family from Pittsburgh; Scott is Jewish from South Florida. We are both very white on the outside, and yet very much sassy black women on the inside. We occasionally finish each other’s sentences. And even when we dont finish each other’s sentences, someone will chime in with a witty or ridiculous comment at the end. When someone asks us to recant a story, we will often both start out with the exact same words and intonation of voice. We are both epic fans of the word “tragesty” – yes, that is the combination of tragedy and travesty. Scott’s husband Mike would often comment that Scott and I could have an entire phone conversation during which Mike only heard the following, “Mmhmm. Okayyy. You know. Gurrrl. I heard her say your momma! Heffer!” Mike would then ask what the sitch was and Scott would merely reply, “we’re going to the movies at 7, duh!”
Anyhow, enjoy the sh*t show/sitcom that is Julian and Scott by checking out some of the “overheard” posts from this weekend. And if you look back some, you’ll find others that Scott contributed to as well – circa 2007.
So I have to admit, one of my new guilty pleasures is watching Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo. In general, I find Patti very negative about the clients that are featured on the show but I also have to admit that she’s generally right. But after watching more episodes than I care to count, I’ve come up with a list of things that men should and shouldnt do for a first date. I’ll update this as time goes on to add to the list. Here goes:
1) Find out if your date is afraid of certain things (heights, helicopters, water, etc). And dont plan a date around those things
2) Most women dont want to be in a bikini on the first date, so be careful with spa dates
3) If you’re going to take a woman to a spa for pampering, dont be the one who gives her the pedicure. Let the professionals do that
4) Flowers go a LONG way
5) Do not take your date for a lesson in mixed martial arts
6) Dont start your date at 7am
7) Dont suggest you end the date in a jacuzzi/hot tub (refer to #2 above for further clarification)